I THINK THAT I'M BIGGER THAN THE SOUND

I'M SINGLE AND READY TO MINGLE, TIFFANY LEFT!!!!

So Tiffany left this morning and i woke up sometime after nine to find her standing over the bed dressed pretty sharp and i got up after being a mole for like half an hour and then saw her off! So she comes back umm monday i think lol she's told me like 1 milllllion times and i keep asking and forgetting
Speaking of monday, that will mark my one week of being beerless, which is weird because i can't remember the last time i went an entire week without drinking, so i decided to see if i could do it juuuust because i guess idk but w/e!!! After Tiff left i went on the computers, played keyboard and guitar and made a really shitty smoothie and went out on the deck (note to self wear shoes the rats of the sky have been leaving their filth mark) okay and so today i feel really good and that's good because the last 2 days i've been feeling really ill and nauseous like before and during and after work until i went to bed. Sometimes i think that the "nausea" i feel sometimes isn't nausea but me just repressing panic and certain anxieties but nothing in parculiar will trigger it i don't thiiiink but i don't know it's weird, but i've been thinking that for a while now cause the nausea doesn't make a lot of sense... it's all in my head maybe, everything always is! But holy i am typing so fast right now cause i'm in such a good mood i keep thinking i have to work at 330 but remember i don't and omg it is nice and warm and sunny out and i have alllll day to just be a fucking pig and the house is a disaaster and soo dirty and messy clothes and dishes and garbage eevvveerywhere lol but i can clean it up wheneveeerrr i want! Maybe i will after this! Maybe i'll play more guitars first after this omg maybe i'll have another croissant. I boughta 12 pack of freshly made croissants, a 6 pack of raisin english muffins, and a bag of popcorn seeds for 8 bucks after work yesterday!!! isn't that nuts? My discount card actually helps quite a bit too so if anyone wants to go grocery shopping at superstore and use it anytime soon lemme know! I should shower though omg and then maybe take a nap then clean up maybe do the dishes that have been sitting in the same water for a few days now looool omg a nap would be so nice right now, i have been waking up really early and going to bed really late lately but since i've moved here i just haven't wanted to wassste the day. Also the tv is hardly eevver turned on ever which was a nice surprise well in the evening if someone turns it on then ya it is, but during the morning or day nevver which is good cause anything is more productive than watching tv i think lol like this blogging for instance....
The other day i was reading through all my privated nexopia blog spanning up to 3 years ago now and i like reading them so much so i thought i should probably keep blogging up for me to read when i'm like 25 lol that would be cool and funny. Wonder where i will be at that time...
Oh yeah 'zine nite tonight it's soooo nice living downtown! i won't have to leave at like 9 now cause getting home to the old place was suuuucccchhhhhhhhhhhh an inconvenience, i don't even want to think about it actually.
So i think either i have TMJ or i severeeeely fucked up my jaw on shrooms last thursday... like i don't remember grinding my teeth or anything cause all i remember was continuously moving every joint and muscle around because every fiber of my being felt soo sick that's the only way i can describe it, even my eyes and eyebrows hurt and my jaw wouldnt stop vibrating and shaking and moving. I remember at one point thinking that if i let my jaw move i won't feel as sick, so i may have just reaaally hurt it in some weird fucked state of mind, but then again i'm not sure because it seems to be getting worse and more sore and i've been getting headaches like almost every day (which is a sign of tmj also) i dunno i don't think it's too serious or anything, except maybe its wearing away at the joint but it seems to be locked right now so it's not popping in and out like usual. But ya i dunno what to say about shrooms now... like nothing bad happened to anyone else annd it's not like i was TRYING to have a bad time for attention you, like as soon as i felt this baad feeling before it really kicked in i was telling myself over and over a million times in my head to just breathe and relax because it's just shrooms nothing bad will happen and i'm going to be okay and as soon as i knew there was no repressing whatever i was feeling i had to remove myself from the situation so i didn't ruin anyone elses time and when jack came to see if i was okay i had to try realllly hard to pull myself together and tell him that i just felt a bit sick and was lying down til i felt good enough to join everyone else, but i knew that i wouldn't be leaving the bed until it stopped. Jussst a horrible, horrible experience. I just can't do drugs i guess and one day i'll have to accept it. -.-

So in other news we tried to adopt a cat and and were hopeful at first but now the girl is having second thoughts about giving it away at all lollll and i havent heard from her in 2 days sooo guess were not getting it. This morning me and tiffany were sitting on the couch and Quasi was on the table dipping his paw into a cup of water and then pulling it out to lick it off and we were just awwwhing and admiring and then Tiffany says something like "Do you think were asking for too much getting another cat anyways?" and before i can answer Quasi bats of the glass full of water and it spills eveeerrywhere and so we both just said "nope."
So who knows maybe we will get another cat eventually but to be honest i wasn't even sure if we could financially support another one.

I bought a pomelo a few weeks ago and remembered it earlier today and i cut it open.............. okay basically what it looks like it a gigaaaantic orange, and when you cut it in half theres about 2 inches of peel and then what looks like half a yellow orange with huuuuuge seeds and the peel is obviously too thick to tear away with hands so i was slicing it for 5 minutes and finally chissled a piece of only to find that it tasted like poison garbage and had to throw out the entire thing like i hope i didn't pay money for that.......................

Lastly i found a bunch of old burnt CD'S from 3 years ago which is always fun. Consists mostly (on all of them) Death From Above, Elliott Smith, Metric, Yeah yeah yeahs, Tegan and Sara, And Garbage! so i'm listening to them right now, not bad!

Okay welllll this is super long gonna go do 3 of the aforementioned possibilities and livin the good life WOEOewoWOEOWEOWOOEWOEOWEWIEWOI!!!!!!!!!!!

bye